.

I took a chance, I took a fall.

F'ever

I am so glad that you are in my life again
I dont know where I would be without you
I lost you once, I know what its like to not have you in my life
and i'll never let it come to that ever again
Do you hear me?
I PROMISE.
I love being around you, just being with you
laying in your arms,
you protect me, i feel safe when im with you
like no one or nothing can harm me
you create this sheild of invincibility
and i feel like i could do anything if i had you backing me up.
You make me feel like a Princess
like I'm the only one for you.
you're the only on for me.
i love the moment where i am in sweatpants and sweat shirt
and you still tell me, ' baby, you're beautiful '
my heart melts. everytime.
doesn't matter if its the thousandth "i love you" or "you're beautiful"
Everytime.
I can't control this feeling i have for you
its the strongest thing i've ever felt
yet makes me the weakest at the same time.
weak in the knees for you.
you make me smile at the stupidest things
laugh at the wrong moments
cry at simple things,
but at the same time; find joy in the simple things.
you are my joy
my world
my everything.
F'ever Baby..

Under Construction

How many times can I break before I shatter?
How many times will you catch me before I fall?
It seems as though,
People have given up on life,
Given up on themselves,
Given up on God.
People have been deceived by the lies of this world.
You can only mess up so many times.
Then you're considered un-forgiven
Fools.
Those who have chosen to not beleive in God
Have no faith in belief
No faith of being reborn
No faith that someone died for them
One heart
One love
One body
Jesus.

Brush off the dust and SHINE

This year i dont feel as close with my leaders,
i feel as though we lack fellowship and are not bound together by his word
but ripped apart by insecurities of new grounds
people never know when someone is going to show up
and when there's an oppourtunity presented to leaders to rise up and speak truth into these kids lives, they are speechless and not feeling "lead by God"
It all comes down to time management
i am sick and tired of people only being leaders 3 hours a week.
I can only talk as much as i want, but it does nothing if you dont listen
When i signed up to be a leader, i expected it to be more than 3 hours a week.
i knew it was, and was prepared to do just that.
hang out with my girls, talk with my girls other than one night a week, go to their sports games, whatever it may be, i would and continue to try and be there as much as i can be.
I know that most people are in school or work full time or something, but would it Really kill you to take an hour or two out of your busy scheduel?
5 minutes, may make the difference in someones week, whether they be in the middle of school, family issues, exciting news or they just need to talk. Them knowing that you're there will make their life SO much easier.
Also; just because you go to bible college doesn't mean you are any better/smarter than any other of the leaders or more godly.
Further-more, If we are called to be a body, we need to function like one.
be there for one another,
let each other know if you arnt going to be there
see how each other are doing
ask if they need prayer
grow in god, so you will be equipped in his word and can influence others.
I can be the first to speak up, and voice my opinion, but i cant be the only one.
you can't always walk a straight line
the world doesn't work that way, the earth is curved
as are our lives,
sometimes you've got to bend when circumstances come along, go out of your way to make things right again.
roll with the punches
To have extraordinairy experiences with your kids, you've got to be an extraordinairy leader.
you can't expect to have a huge impact in these girls lives if you dont show an interest outside of youth. you could, but its very unlikely
For kids to be reached, we need to reach out.

Found

I need you,
I want you,
I cant live without you.
To the ends of this earth, to heaven and back.
you dont know how much you mean to me.
you dont know how much i rely on you
depend on you
want your comfort
and need your love
You light a fire within my heart
and passion within my soul
ignite a spark a hope
and truth of love
that is out there
and i have found
i thank you
for finding me.

Clear as Mud

Like a vase I shatter
And like a star i fall
I walk so close to the edge
I am blinded by the drop
Each day anew
I wonder where ill be
Walking a straight line
Or the plank to eternity
Evil clouds my judgement
Lies deceive my belief in truth
Every turn is an up hill battle
Just waiting to be won
Where do I make these turns
How I discover pure truth?
Where do I go so there is no more evil?
Blank stare and jaw hanging
Heaven.
Simple answer
Simple truth
Simple love.

Love is blind; What do you see?

Lost&Saved

Do you notice that Im there ?
Am I even worth the care
Would you follow me if I chose to leave
Would you catch me if i lost my balance
and needed your embrace
Im falling in a downward s p i r a l
And Im getting dizzy, I'm ready to give up
This love of yours is t e m p o r a r y
I can see right through your eyes
And pierce through your heart

So no you know what heart break feels like?
You don't even know the starting of it.
Taken a leave of absence,
Now what will you do to mend your heart
Bleeding forever, tears silently fall
No bandaid is strong enough for this
Fallen tears tend to mend the broken
Tend to break the strong, and give strength to the meak

Hold me close, never let me fall
For I fear what I will be without you
It's not pretty.
Set things straight between us
Hear it here first, Fall in love with me first
Yourself last.
Please believe this charade I am putting on for you
Kiss of death, kiss of life, kiss of eternity
For once there was a lonely girl
Who felt she had no meaning
No reason to live, no reason to be loved.
You loved her, you held her;
You s a v e d her.

Coming To Terms

Would you hold on to promises?
Even if you we’re not aware of their worth.
Choose one path
And fall down the rest
Take a break from the run of love
Because you’ve fallen short of breath.
Come deep into the woods
Of the shadows of deception
You seem to be quite intrigued
By the history of complexion.
Tilting and Wilting
Fallen out of thin air
You seem to keep yourself doubted
From the thought of simple care.
Falling from the universe
You land on foreign ground
Coming to know the consequence of this
You’re left standing with diamonds in your hands.
It’s hard to walk a straight line
When you’re nothing but on the break line
Walking on eggshells
Falling on broken glass
With the world on your shoulders
And good conscience on your back.
You’re finding it hard to believe
That you’ll ever come to terms.

NutShell

I definetely wish I had more to say or something unique and provoking, but I don't. Most people would know me to be someone who always has a lot to say and have these really "out-there" thoughts and strong opinions. Over the years, I feel as though I have lost that yearning to write more and talk less, speak through writting, and inspire others to write what they feel. There is no greater feeling of accomplishment of expressing yourself than putting your pen to paper(or in this sense, typing your little heart away). I wish I still had that same passion for writting as I did when i Was 16. Oh, to be 16 again. When my life was upside down, I didn't know what was up and what was wrong, what was right or wrong, good or bad. Life, or death. Now I feel as though I still have that passion to write, but not as much as I used to. Sometimes, I would be so eager to write, I would tear out a piece of paper then and there and spill my guts. Now, you'll be lucky if you get a complete sentence. When I write, I don't write in complete sentences, I don't usually write with commas, abrieviations, etc. I write free style, from the heart, and I have learned that a poem does not have to rhyme. One of my greatest accomplishments I think. I usually don't write paragraphs, stories, poems or songs. I write whats on my heart and usually my heart doesnt have time for periods, commas, and spellcheck.

Would You

Would you fall from the sky
Would you go to the ends of the earth
Would you go to the depths of the sea
Would you dance with the stars
Would you put your heart on the line
With no answers known
Would you risk it all
Even if you’d end up alone
Would you hold on to the promises
If they were never kept
Would you dwell on forever
If the end was never met
Would you still love me
Through all my imperfections‘cause
I’d be there for you
no matter what the cause
no matter what the danger
no matter what the circumstances
I’ll catch you when you fall
Ill be the light that guides you along
The one by your side when things go wrong
I can promise all these; and more.
Hoping for the future;
even if I don’t know whats in store
So take my heart; its yours to hold
Just look me in the eyes and take my hands
And together I promise
Through good and bad; we can.

The Hidden Message

The sites I see
Remind me of the begotten Italy
Soft mosaics, covered in spider’s web’s
Broken and cracked
Laid bare, to tell all.
But oh, if these walls could talk,
If these cracks could tell,
If this darkness could speak.
Then you would know my world
The spirits of stone,
The soul of nature,
And the heart of light.
They all tell a story,
Quite dull, but dim,
Continuous I go.
Prevailing I fall into the ocean.
These waves they look as though
They aren’t even real
Toppling over each other
Tripping and stumbling over gusts of wind
The last thing you’ll remember
Are the beating hearts of this hemisphere
And the fallen tears of fire
How can they fall so fast
Yet leave so quickly
Quite the riddle within itself.

My Heart Is Hung Up High Upon The Past

Feel the same, but I hold back
I cannot act upon this heartbeat
Try so hard to hold my composure
But each time I end up in defeat
Convincing myself that you’re not right
That everything has to be perfect
But the best things in life are imperfections
It’s taken ages for this to click
Trying hard, these tears they fall,
Hold on tight, the end is near.
Ignore the soft spoken sweet nothing’s,
Keep telling yourself, there’s nothing here.
Do you see what you do to me?
Take a glance through the looking glass.
It’d be so easy, just to agree,
But my heart is hung high, upon the past.
I hurt you so, it hurts me more,
Try my hardest to anchor thoughts.
Follow my heart, but I’m broken inside,
These bars I’ve felt; these bars I’ve fought.
Living in a war that I call heart,
Fighting for myself, I end up lost.
Lost in your daze and simple smile,
But each heartbeat, comes at a cost.
Two different worlds, combined into one.
Fallen and unstable, I cry for mercy, I’m done.
Wish I could explain this heart of mine,
But two shadowed lives, will form to shine.